May 2010
BREAKING MADNESS: MLIA is very wise. →
I got lost in this small Alabama town, because none of the side streets had signs. I stopped and asked these two old men sitting on a porch for directions, which they cheerfully gave. I commented on the lack of street signs, and one of them said “Son, you don’t need no signs if you know where…
Nylah: When I go to boarding school I'll have a million friends and unlike you I won't learn Korean. I'll learn something useful like Italian or Norwegian.
Kat: I've swear every Norwegian I've met was outrageously hot, albeit; I've only met two and one was a girl.
Nylah: What if the world blows up? Where are we going to meet then?
Kat: Are we survivors in this post-apocalyptic scenario?
Nylah: Yeah, we'll go on a space station like Zenon.
Kat: Do I get to be a cool warrior in black leather and steel?
Nylah: What?
Kat: OH. Zenon not Xena.
The Phone is an Outdated Form of Communication
Nylah: Did you check your voicemail?
Kat: No. You're the only one who calls me.
Nylah: Wow, what a loser.
Kat: Hey! That's not say no one talks to me. It means that the phone is as current as a VCR.
Nylah: What's a VCR?
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DONT RAIN TODAY
fzk you sky.
Sixteenth Year
simplybriana:
I’m freaking 16 years old, man! EAT THAT WORLD!!! Here I come. I’m totally not forty yet, but…
“I’m very pleased with each advancing year. It stems back to when I was forty. I was a bit upset about reaching that milestone, but an older friend consoled me. ‘Don’t complain about growing old—many, many people do not have that privilege.’” - Earl Warren
p.s. And a Happy Birthday to...
My narcissism knows no bounds.
Dear Waffles,
dearmeat:
I don’t usually intend to fill up my cliche quota before twelve, but there’s no getting around what I feel for you. At a time when I have never felt groggier, YOU were the caped crusader (along with your trusty sidekick chocolate milk) who aroused me from out of my chamber of solitude and to gaze out the window and take note of what a beautiful day it was. You are not only...
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TheSims3
Nylah: I love the 'imply your mother is a llama' action.
Kat: Your mom's a llama.
Nylah: No, it's /imply/.
Kat: Your mother grazes and has an extensively long neck.
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Dear BP,
dearmeat:
It would be really awesome if — oh, I don’t know — the ocean was still around in a few years, so FUCKING FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT. Waiting, Humans.
“If we wait for the moment when everything, absolutely everything is ready, we...”
– Ivan Turgenev (via fuckyeahrussianliterature) (via saveyourcrookedteeth) (via keremmermutlu)
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Breakfast
So I just ate two cinnamon buns and then promptly threw up. The good thing is I got to taste them twice. The bad things is so did my dog.
Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not...
thingsidontunderstandand:
I have all the pieces.
I just want someone else to put them together.
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Books plz
Kat: Getting locked in Barn and Nobles would be the best night ever.
Nick: I've had this fantasy of being locked in a grocery store and just like trashing shit.
Kat: Only you.
Nick: I'd like knock over shelves, break bottles, light stuff on fire. . . and then make mac and cheese.
Nick: What? I like mac and cheese. . . and fire.
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“Kat. This is advice from your best friend who is going to major in psycology and...”
– Sybil
LOST's Unanswered Questions →
natalietenaya:
This is fantastic.
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I CAN HAS CAPS?!
Nick: HEY CAPS LOCK TIME.
Kat: ITS THE CRUISE CONTROL FOR COOL
Nick: IVE HEARD THAT BEFORE WHO SAID THAT?
Kat: IDK I SAW IT ON A SHIRT
Nick: THIS IS AWESOME. ITS LIKE YELLING WITHOUT THE VOICE STRAIN.
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the things I find in my newsfeed
Nick’s Status: Daft Punk ♥
Manuel: Oh wow. What is the song you listened to that got you to say this? Cos just to let you know Daft Punk is always where it starts. Electro love is a slippery slope buddy.
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Daniel: Do you know why today's awesome?
Kat: Not sure. Enlighten me.
Daniel: Emporer Shenzong of China was born today. Don't be such a n00b.
Dear Neighbor's Cats,
dearmeat:
I don’t know what in FUCK you all do when you’re owner is gone, but quiet down. Sometimes it’s crashing of pots or something, the next day it sounds like someone is beating you. Also, when I go to get the paper don’t lay in the window showing me your lady parts. You are the sluttiest cat I know. Oh yeah, get a new meow, because the shit you do is not meowing. Its a combination of an...
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Remi: What are we doing tonight?
Mom: Going out to eat for Katherine's birthday.
Remi: . . . Why?
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Happy Birthday to Me.
When I was kid I would always wonder what I’d be like when I’m sixteen. And I have to say, I’m not impressed. Haha.
Age may change but you never really do.
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“One day [Kat’s] gonna get sunburned [on her legs], and you’re going...”
– Briana (yes I did read my yearbook from last year because I don’t get one this year xD)
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When I said I like you like I like puppies I meant in the you’re-needy-but-good-company way not the you’re-cute-and-lovable-I-want-to-take-you-home way.
LOST...
killmotion:
fujiidom / betternovembers / theriverjordan:
To paraphrase an old Stephen King quote for a new usage: If reading Harry Potter was about learning how to live, then watching LOST was about learning how to die.
“In response to the common criticism that Holden Caulfield, the narrator of The...”
– John Green (via undreamedshorelines) (via effyeahnerdfighters)
Dear Scarlett Johansson's Performance in Iron Man...
dearmeat:
You inspire me to be B.A.M.F Sincerely, Women in America
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Sybil: These random middleastern men keep sending me skype requests....did you like put my username on a middleastern 30+ chat dating site? I wouldn't put it past you.
Kat: Damn, I wish I thought of that.
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Plan A
Kat: Quick, distract me!
Nylah: I have a plan.
Kat: What's step one?
Nylah: Iunno I didn't get that far yet.
Kat: Well, what is it for?
Nylah: Again, did not get that far. You pick.
Kat: Let's make a plan to take over Antarctica.
Nylah: Dude, that's so easy. All we have to do it get there.
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Fierce
Mom: My personal trainer is so fierce.
Kat: Like Christian Siriano fierce?
Mom: Yeah. If I were a gay man that's who I'd want to date.
Kat: Interesting.
